Happy Valentine’s Day to those of you who observe. If you hate this Hallmark holiday and everything it stands for, I shall wish you a Happy Tuesday instead. As for me, I enjoyed Valentine’s Day as a kid, when we delivered cards to everyone in class and mainlined candy hearts and chocolate all day. This morning, I saw my hipster neighbor’s kids on their way to school, dressed head to toe in heart-patterned sweatsuits and tiny checkerboard vans. It was trés adorable. Not sure if this rumor is true, but I heard that kids are discouraged from giving out Valentine’s candy now because of allergies, or perhaps for fear of a hopped-up rugrat smashing all the classroom windows. In lieu of sugar, kids hand out non-edible gifts like rulers wrapped in bows with a note that says, “You rule, Valentine.” I’m just glad I grew up in an era when it was okay to give your friend a box of chalky Brach’s Conversation Hearts or a Whitman’s Sampler and nobody broke out in hives or a needed a sedative.
The Patron Saints of Heartbreak
In adulthood, I spent many Valentine’s Days on my lonesome, drowning my sorrows, and listening to sad songs by Burt Bacharach—the debonair composer/song writer/producer/arranger who left this mortal coil on February 8th at the age of 94. Apart from a few upbeat numbers like “This Guy’s in Love with You,” the Bacharach/David songbook served as the ultimate break up, anti-romance, and unrequited love soundtrack for those of us who, at some point in our lives, identified as jilted. That’s why I was surprised to read in the New York Times obit that Bacharach’s hit songs reflected the “romantic optimism” of the 60s. Romantic optimism? Surely you jest, NYT! Bacharach and David’s most popular ditties are pretty darn pessimistic about romance if you ask me. “What do you get when you fall in love? You only get lies and pain and sorrow. So for at least until tomorrow, I’ll never fall in love again.” Or “One less bell to answer. One less egg to fry. One less man to pick up after. I should be happy, but all I do is cry.” “If you see me walking down the street, and I start to cry each time we meet, walk on by.” “I just don’t know what to do with my time. I’m so lonesome for you it’s a crime.” And my personal favorite, the oh so plaintive “Anyone Who Had A Heart,” with its tinkling minor key piano notes.
Anyone who had a heart
would take me in his arms and love me, too
You couldn't really have a heart and hurt me
like you hurt me and be so untrue
What am I to do?
Who hasn’t been there? AmIRight? First recorded by Cilla Black in 1964, “Anyone Who Had a Heart” reached #1 and held the record for the UK’s top selling single by a female British artist for most of the decade. Based on the record sales, listeners clearly related to having their hearts crushed to bits. Cilla’s version is great, and there are tons of singers who bring a special something to the song, but I’m partial to Maureen McGovern’s rendition. McGovern—a Broadway actress and singer who had hits with songs like “The Morning After” (1972) and “I Won’t Last A Day Without You” (1973)—starts the song soft and breathy before she belts out heart-wrenching phrasing and sings as only a person suffering the anguish of heartache can, especially at the end when she pleads,“Why won’t you?” Her version, which is quite rare, was included on “The Burt Bacharach Songbook,” a 2 CD collection that I purchased many moon ago, you know, back when we listened to CDs. As far as I can tell, it isn’t available for streaming.
I wanted to embed a video of McGovern singing the song here, but it doesn’t exist anywhere on the Interwebs. All I could find was a weird YouTube video with the song playing over illustrations of angels, crosses, a photo of someone’s family, and a dog by a fireplace. Feel free to search for it if you dare. In the meantime, I’ve added the song here as an audio file for your listening pleasure.
Burt & Elvis
In 1998, Elvis Costello teamed up with Burt Bacharach and released the album “Painted from Memory.” Each song is more depressing than the next, but oh so beautiful. I had just moved to Los Angeles to escape a dismal and sputtering love life in San Francisco and these songs made me very weepy and nostalgic. When I heard about Burt’s death, I checked Elvis’s FB page and discovered that a new record of their collaboration is coming out in March. One of the songs on the collection is “Anyone Who Had A Heart!” Whee! Find out more here. And to hear a wonderful tribute to Burt, and interviews Terry Gross did with Burt + Hal and Burt + Elvis, plus snippets of many of the greatest hits, check out this Fresh Air episode here.
Leave It To The Pros
If you’ve ever tried to sing a Bacharach tune and you’re not a pro or a trained vocalist, it probably didn’t go well. A friend once secretly signed me up to sing “Walk on By” at Karaoke, and, this is a deep cut but does anyone remember Alfalfa from The Little Rascals singing “Arbor Day?” That was me trying to hit the high notes. Elvis said that the songs he did with Burt were very demanding vocally and emotionally. The New York Times described Burt’s compositions as “rangy, fiercely difficult melodies, with tricky time signatures and extended asymmetrical phrases,” the likes of which only very gifted vocalists (ie:Dionne Warwick) could handle. Burt said in his interview with Terry Gross that he selfishly wrote songs with tons of time signatures and wasn’t really thinking about how difficult it would be for the musicians to perform. Dionne sings them all effortlessly. I saw Dionne in concert about ten years ago and she smoked a cigarette on stage in between sets and still glided through tough numbers with ease like “Alfie” and “Do You Know The Way to San Jose?” Just watch the video below and marvel at her vocal control.
Wish I Could’ve Seen
There’s a trend on Facebook right now where people rank the live concerts they’ve attended. One of the categories is, “Wish I Could’ve Seen.” For me that is Burt and Elvis together, no question. Here’s the good news—as I was searching YouTube for songs to include here, I found a decent quality recording of the duo performing a selection of songs (including “Anyone Who Had a Heart”) with Steve Nieve and a live orchestra. Elvis gives a little speech about twelve minutes in, explaining that he and Burt initially collaborated over the phone and fax machines and decided that all the songs would be about lost love. I’m posting the concert below as my Valentine’s Day gift to you. What better way to spend the day than listening to songs about lost love by two musical masters?
As Terry Gross said about Burt Bacharach, “How lucky we are to have all the songs he gave us.” If you love Burt Bacharach and have a favorite tune, please post it in the comments. And thanks for reading, commenting, and subscribing. You Rule, Valentine! 💋 ❤️
Also from the Elvis/Burt songbook I love this one (this version particularly). https://youtu.be/pJvKN7MS_9w
My mom was a big fan and we had the Burt Bacharach songbook and we’d sing songs from it around the piano when I was a kid - What the World Needs Now, I’ll never fall in love again and Raindrops keep Falling on My Head. Sometimes we’d attempt Do You Know the Way to San Jose but apparently it was too hard for her to play!! All those tricky time signatures and such. :)